BURNING QUESTIONS

[A rope leash]

Since I'm stuck here in South Carolina and completely straight, I thought I might spend some time coming up with a few questions on topics of interest to me, in the hope that I might spark a bit of conversation. Just read along until you become so appalled that you just HAVE to respond.

Why aren't more Christians socialists? That's the true "love thy brother" system. Capitalism cares nothing about human needs.

How is it fair that a young Palestinian should die today because he threw a rock at an Isreali tank? Why must there be retribution for every attack? Wouldn't "turning the other cheek" break the cycle of revenge? Isn't tit-for-tat a child's game?

God so loved the world he gave his only begotten son. If Jesus died for our sins, is Jesus now in Hell? What sort of sacrifice is it to die and go to Heaven? If Jesus was not in his grave-cave the Sunday after his crucifiction, then did his actual body rise up to heaven? Isn't it more likely that he survived, hid out, and perpetuated his legend so that
the gospels could be written?

If dog is man's best friend, why don't they do more of the common labor? Come on, they're right down there where they could be picking up litter. Instead of digging up the garden, couldn't they be digging post-holes? They have great noses, but they are zero help when it comes to finding the car keys, or the remote. Cats could pull more weight, too.

What's so special about somebody's birthday? Or Mother's Day? Or Father's Day? Dad couldn't keep his dick in his pants and Mom couldn't say "no", and in the rush of it there's no rubber, nor even a timely withdrawal on Dad's part, so we get yet another shit-machine to run over the planet and consume it. Why do people have a "right" to reproduce?
What makes you guys think you're just so fucking great that there has to be another one of you? Clearly, overpopulation will be the death of us all, so why aren't we more worried about it?

Why does the History Channel always have shows about UFOs? Are they fact, or is history bullshit? Why are all the "declassified" government documents referring to UFOs full of blotted-out text? Why do governments need so much secrecy? Is it because the average person cannot take the facts? Or is it because we have been invaded and are under the control
of super-beings from the future? (I understand that they told you to change the subject whenever UFOs are brought up, but they said the same thing to me, so we can talk...).

Why is it that every town I go to has an assortment of TV "news people" that seemingly have no discernable talent for communication? The vast majority of local newscasters are ugly people with awful voices who stumble through the news like a kid reading a handwritten essay. What happens here? Do they say to themselves," I can be whatever I want to be, and I want to be a news anchor, even though my voice is squeakey, I can barely read, I have zero presence, and I'm very hard to look at"? Who hires these fucks? I ask this knowing full well I could walk in to any of these stations and do a much better job right off the street. I wouldn't make a bad Baptist preacher, either. Good money, and very easy,
once a week. It's just fervent lying, that's all.

If an awful war results in the genocide of a certain religious group, and if after that war it is "agreed" that that group should be allowed to return to thier "holy land", and if that land is clearly worn out and duly occupied by another religious entity, wouldn't a nice tropical island be a great alternative? What is so important about "place"?

Why do we need a "star wars" missle defense system? Wouldn't this also protect us from retaliation if we decided to go on the offensive? Why didn't Saddam use his WMDs? Why don't we go after North Korea, and liberate them? Is it because they have a bomb? Wouldn't you want a nuke if it meant that the USA would not attack you?

How is it that if you don't support the war you don't support the troops? Was the war their idea? Don't we "support" them by paying taxes? I know for a fact that most folks join up because it is their best financial opportunity. They need funds for college, ect. (Imagine that, rich folks...). Very few sign up to be a "hero".

In a world so full of color, why must every issue be painted in black and white terms? You're "left" or "right", "liberal" or "conservative", "fer us" or "agin us". Lables are so fucking sticky.

When did we become such sheep?

Since when does the military target heads of state? If you desire regime change, how hard would it be to pay an assassin to assassinate someone? Why bomb the fuck out of everything and kill thousands of innocents when a two-dollar bullet would do the same job? The estimate is that we killed some 3500 innocent civilians in Iraq, and an unknowable number of "evil" Saddam-loyal troops. How are we clean? How are we different? How is this just?

Whats so funny about peace, love, and understanding?

[King of Confidence]

Cats could pull more weight, dammit.

[shabbydoll]

I've got one answer! That was like a pub quiz where you can't get any of the questions right. The answer to the last one is a single assassin can not surround and take control of an oil field. If I win please give my winnings to charity (are all charities just shams)?

[taz]

I'm apalled!!!!

Okay...so I just agree with Rope too much to reply...alright, plus I'm drunk and at work currently...my bad

[so lacklustre]

Arl - I can't argue with any of that, it's just common sense.

What is so great about democracy?
When the biggest selling papers are the crap tabloids, the biggest selling books are trash paperbacks, the most popular tv programmes are 'reality' shows for exhibitionists, the blockbuster movies are formulaic action or romantic thrillers. Can we trust these people to vote for the people to govern us? Not imo, but I don't have any solutions.

[Otis Westinghouse]

... and a dictatorship would keep the proles in their rightful place?

Nice to see you again, ARL. My burning question is how come you move around so much and seem to have lived everywhere in the US?

I love your newsreader observations! Selective comments on other points:

Kids: doesn't mean you think you're great to self-perpetuate. Tens of thousands of years of evolution give a pretty strong genetic basis to do this. If you're in a situation where you can do it and want to, and you're not a total misanthrope, then why not? And even if you are, it might help you. Saying that life is too crap to perpetuate is an argument for immediate suicide. And besides, it was great being made a huge fuss of this morning by the rest of the family, and I deserve it!

Place: is identity, like language. Take it away, and the will to fight for it will be immense. And when it represents identity for two groups, how can one bow down? And how can only one side turn the other cheek? They need to turn it together, and seeing as there's always something to retaliate against, the imperative is always for one of the sides to retaliate. the only hope is for leaders with a genuine desire for peace to win the faith of their people, but how difficult is that?

[A rope leash]

Ah, so glad to see some response this morning.

Shabby - You clearly have a better grasp on the subject of regime change than I do. I think this also explains why we are not liberating the Congo.

I'm donating your prize to my favorite charity: Me.

K of C - I know. Cats could really help out with security issues. They would make great spies, and a rather cruel weapon. They could pick up them candy wrappers, too.

Taz - Thank you so much for the new board. You too, Tux. Why is it you can drink yourself into oblivion, but I can't smoke a joint and go to sleep? Legally, I mean...

So Lack - If we allowed the Iraqis to vote, they would vote for an Islamist republic. We won't allow them to vote until we have our puppets in place to provide canidates of our liking. Democracy works okay, but our style of democracy is rather "fixed", that is, controlled by big money.

OW! - Yes, truly my rantings on procreation spew from the fact that I'm stuck in a hotel room this weekend, and I will not be fussed over one iota today, because I am childless. I've been supporting two of Josie's kids for three years now, but who is getting the love today? That fat ass prick dad of thiers, who is continuing to have children because he wants a boy to carry on his hick heritage. That is totally irresponsible. The guy has six kids, and is only paying to support one of them, as far as I can tell. His nuts should be cut.

Yes, I do understand the human connection to Earth places, but I just thought if we could give one or the other a nice little paradise, it would solve a lot of hassles. Someone has to stop the cycle of revenge, and that should be the more powerful of the two, in my view.

Now, as for how I seem to get around, it has to do with my "profession", which is a field service sort of thing. Years ago I had a vision, whereupon someone named "Luke" told me not to travel. Of course, the next day I was offered a job in Reno, and my life of travel began. I figure if some spiritual entity wants to give me advice, he could meet me down at Denny's instead of coming to me in some strange dream.

I now work in the satellite communications business, and I travel the south and midwest, for the most part. I drove about 75,000 miles last year in a Ford van, and I'm on track to beat that number this year. Since I deal with two-way systems, I can literally pull over to the side to hook up and surf. Right now, I have a small system set up out on the patio of my hotel room, and I am surfing at about 750K.

I love it, and I hate it.

Thanks guys, it's good to have someone to talk to.

aropeleash@hotmail.com

[Gillibeanz]

Doggie I was digusted after I read the first few words!!! - you are straight? Whats wrong with gay people?....no wait.....that wasnt one of your topics was it?


Why aren't more Christians socialists? Because all religion sucks basically! Take the christian faith - based on a selfish whim of King Henry V111 to get rid of his current wife! When it comes down to any religion people believe and follow as far as it is convenient to themselves to do so, and those that are devout and follow it to the letter are also selfish because it leaves no room for logic and leniency. All in all religion is a no win situation Doggie and more people have lost their lives over it than I care to even try to imagine!

Must there be retribution for every attack?- Course not but then you would have to take each case individually. Throwing a rock at a tank is one thing - exterminating millions of jews is another - should we turn the cheek for that?

Did Jesus really die? Theres a lot of debate about that one isnt there? A lot of people think he was in a deep coma. I actually know someone that came to on the mortuary slab!!! What I cant get my head around in this 'heaven and hell' bit is if God is all forgiving of your sins why would he not let you in and send you to hell??

Dog is mans best friend. You could beat the shit out of it and it would still love you! Many dogs do pull their weight - serving in the army, police force, hearing for the deaf, seeing for the blind, drug sniffing etc. Bloody hell, I even saw a programme whereby they can train dogs to inform their owners when they are about to have an epileptic fit so they can stop what they are doing lay down and prepare for it. The dog then lies on their chest until the fit is over preventing them from thrashing around. Also they have now taught dogs to sniff out cancer on humans before it shows up on any medical examination - the list is endless. Shame on you Doggie for dissing them - GO TO YOUR BASKET!!!!

As for cats - no argument!!

Birthdays/mothers day etc - commericalized rubbish to make you feel guilty and spend money! If you value someone then you should show it every day in practical ways. I guess on the reproducing side we are all either selfish if we want kids, irresponsible if we get them and we dont. Thats why ive been so responsible and unselfish and stopped at only 3!! ( Also after the 3rd I also found out what was causing them - nothing at all to do with bellybuttons like I had been told!!!)

As for the alien question, short and sweet - I know for a fact they are here - I am one!

Dunno what kind of people you employ over there but our newsreaders here in the UK are all pretty normal - infact most of them have become sex symbols.

People returning to their country of origin - we all need to be able to go to a place where we belong Doggie, - thats why im going to tell you to... GO TO YOUR BASKET!!!

Bombs - I think we should get rid of the whole worlds bombs - blow them all up....wait a minute - that would mean we would all die anyway wouldnt it? Hmmm....id better re-think this one. By the way I see all Saddams family want to come for a holiday in the UK. Course they wouldnt claim refugee status once here. Well I believe them and think we should give them all a council house and free hand outs for the rest of their lives - that poor family has been suffered enough....

Support the troops? I do if any of them play for Tottenham Hotspur!

Why does everything have to be black and white? Well it did before colour TV was invented. Personally id like to be coloured blue - its my favourite!

When did we become such sheep? People have always followed the herd and those that dont and have a little originality are ostracized and ridiculed. If everyone adopted my policy of 'live and let live and if someone is living the life they want and not hurting anyone else then good luck to them' it would be a peaceful world.

Since when does the military target heads of state? I agree with you on this one Doggie. I think I might do a poll with the question of 'is executing a murderer justifiable?' Could make for an interesting exchange of views.

Whats so funny about peace, love, and understanding? When I find out the answer to this one I will let you know!

Bloody hell - this is the longest load of crap ive posted yet!!!!

[pip_52]

Havent we done the lone assassin thing before?


Sorry, I just couldnt be appalled . . .

[A rope leash]

Of course, by straight I mean substance-free. My brother is gay, and I have nothing against him, but he's only half out of the closet because so many people do have something against it!

What I mean by dogs doing more is that they could do out of a sense of duty, rather than being conditioned to do it. Teaching a dog to sniff out hemp is animal abuse!

Yes, I love my basket, but if you offered me your bed I'd jump right in!

[SweetPear]

Gilli, God is all forgiving but you have to repent and ask for that forgiveness.

And as for those dogs and cats....it just makes me think that if we were being looked down upon by some alien being, who do you think they'd see the master as being......us humans who are down on our hands and knees cleaning out litter boxes and with big shovels hauling dog dirt or the animals who are sitting back watching us do it????

[so lacklustre]

Gilli wrote:

Why does everything have to be black and white? Well it did before colour TV was invented.

If I remember Black and White telly was mostly different shades of grey (colour/color).
Colour telly is mostly grey (content).

Gilli wrote:

Why aren't more Christians socialists? Because all religion sucks basically! Take the christian faith - based on a selfish whim of King Henry V111 to get rid of his current wife!

I think you're confusing christianity with Church of England. Christianity goes back way before HVIII, in fact nearly back to when Jesus was alive.

[A rope leash]

Sweet, by "repent" you mean that we must admit we are "sinners", and give ourselves over to "God", or in some cases, accept Jesus Christ as the one and only means of getting to heaven. Then we ask God to "forgive" us, and even if we are as wicked as Hell, we get into heaven. Am I reading you right?

Tell me, if you would, must we actually believe this fantastic scenario is real, or is just saying the words out loud enough? Muslims, Buddists, Hindus, and other such folks do not do this "forgiveness" thing, so they must be damned to Hell, then, correct?

Many murderers claim to have found Jesus and that they have asked God to forgive them. We execute them anyway. Many other people are killed in the name of "God", with plenty of "gospel" to back them up.

If all we have to do is ask forgiveness, doesn't that give us the go ahead to do any nasty thing we want? What exactly determines what a sin is? A violation of the Ten Commandments? By that scheme, rape is perfectly okay, but admiring your neighbors's car is a bad bad thing.

Religion is the single most divisive force among humans, and is essentially a highly elevated system of superstition, designed to keep you at work and to excuse such things as bigotry and war.

I'm an agnostic, which means I have no idea if there is a God or not, but I know that the odds are great that such fantastic entities do not exist. I don't pray, I act. I feel no need for forgiveness, because my morality comes out of an innate sense of fairness and common sense. Does this mean that if I do not repent, that I am going to Hell after I die, simply because I lust after my cousin's V8 Mustang?

If you do believe this, then you might also see how that might start a fight, or a war. It's bullshit, and Elvis knows it.

If only dust could talk...

Try http://www.ffrf.org

[so lacklustre]

A rope leash wrote:

Try http://www.ffrf.org

That looks like a good religion.

[Gillibeanz]

SOLACKLUSTRE: Oops! Meant to put The church of England/christian faith! Members of the the church of England regard theirselves as christians - same thing! And if it wasnt black and white TV why was it called that on the licence and not grey TV?

SWEET PEAR: I agree with the doggie - if you say oh sorry God when you have murdered someone does that make it all ok and you get to go to heaven anyway? Kinda like the Catholic faith - you can sin all you like as long as you go to confession and repent. Guess that lets off all those priests and nuns that abuse kids. It makes me sick - my partner is currently working for a woman who is suing her priest for sexually abusing her as a child - the result of which not only is she totally screwed up but cant have children either. He also lost a friend who comitted suicide as he was sexually abused as a child by a priest and could never come to terms with it. My childhood friend went to a catholic school where the teachers were nuns who were very strict. Their idea of punishing them if they got their bible quotes wrong was to hit them over the knuckles with a ruler. He hated school and was so stressed he developed a stammer. Like I said a lot of bad things are done in the name of religion.

ROPE: Being straight here in the UK means being heterosexual - guess we have a language difference!

[Goody2Shoes]

Since when does the military target heads of state? If you desire regime change, how hard would it be to pay an assassin to assassinate someone? Why bomb the fuck out of everything and kill thousands of innocents when a two-dollar bullet would do the same job? ?

It's funny that the man of the house and I were discussing this very point 3 or 4 days ago.

War is "legal" and assassination is "murder", and, therefore, illegal. We wouldn't want the rest of the world to think we would condone illegal activity, now would we? Sheesh.

Also, since it's illegal, you can't brag about it afterwards, which is an important point to consider in your bid for re-election.

[noiseradio]

If someone asks pointless loaded questions in a forest, do the trees hear his one hand clapping?

[A rope leash]

The sound of one hand clapping is very dim. While there is no evidence that trees have the mechanisms to hear it, it does not mean that they cannot hear it. The answer to this question is unknowable, although many will say they know the answer, even though total proof is unavailable.

They believe truth comes from within, even though the universe that includes them is not only more mysterious than they imagine, it is more mysterious than they can imagine. They feel that if they believe it, it must be true, and if it comes from within, then it must come from God.

How's that?

If a bear shits in the woods, and there are no olfactories there to detect it, does it still smell?

The answer is yes, and not because God is there to smell it, but because shit stinks.

Anybody else wanna fuck with the dog?

[Gillibeanz]

Anybody else wanna fuck with the dog?

Now theres a loaded question!!!!

[so lacklustre]

The Ents hear.

[A rope leash]

Gee, So Lack, what's an Ent?

O! Gilli!

Noise, sorry I got ticked. How can a question be pointless and loaded at the same time? The questions were pointed, and loaded, and designed to stir up shit. You got me.

As for the sound of one hand clapping, the only way this can happen is with the fingers tapping against the palm. Others might say the other hand is God's. In any case, the clapping produces waves in the atmosphere which can be picked up by a hearing device, such as an ear.

As far as we know, trees have no ears.

So, I'm done screwing with people for a while. I gotta head out to Greenwood, then to Augusta, then hopefully home. Y'all continue on with your polite conversations, and I'll be thinking of you while I'm wiring up your future cage.

[so lacklustre]

Rope - Ents are from Lord of the Rings.

Treebeard (Fangorn for short)
Treebeard is an Ent. Ents are the most uniquely Tolkienian beings in The Lord of the Rings or for that matter anywhere in Tolkien's work; perhaps even more uniquely Tolkienian than Hobbits. Treebeard looks like a tree, moves like a tree and talks like an Ent. Ents are the Shepherds of the Trees. They live their lives extremely slowly and have a great aversion to haste. But when someone brings them news of a great danger growing on their northern border, the resulting committee meeting lasts only three days! Any arborealist can tell you that a tree will bring down a building in time. Ents have haste stored up just for times like these.
"Treebeard" translates the Elvish name "Fangorn" (beard-of-tree), which is also the name of the forest where he lives. "Ent" is an Old English word for a giant being.

Here is a picture from the 1978 animated film.

[Copenhagen Fan]

Is the expression "one hand clapping" a euphemism for masterbation???

*very appropriate on the "mental masterbation thread to end all threads"*

[mood swung]

What's so special about somebody's birthday? Or Mother's Day? Or Father's Day?...Why do people have a "right" to reproduce?
What makes you guys think you're just so fucking great that there has to be another one of you? Clearly, overpopulation will be the death of us all, so why aren't we more worried about it?

Well, to be honest I did it for the great gifts! No, seriously, I've got two boys and two girls so I'm conducting gender studies. This just in: Boys and girls are different.

But for you, Arl, I will offer forth a theory that a FRIEND of mine proposed to me. It in NO WAY reflects my views on having kids or not having kids. My friend said to me that it was my genetic duty to reproduce and to do it in a BIG way, because in twenty years time or so, my demographic would be far far in the minority and did I want slum lords running my country?

I had my four because I am addicted to being loved and needed with such fierceness. We ain't on welfare and not one of them has yet to be in trouble with the law. (knock wood). They're smart, they're capable of independent thought and they don't litter.

[spooky girlfriend]

MS: Boys and girls are different. Raising three boys and one girl highlights that for me every day.

And I didn't get all four of my kids the conventional way - I birthed two and inherited two others who needed a mom. But I still spend every day making sure they all grow up to be productive members of society with something positive to contribute. I feel exhausted trying to do so most days, but I know that if I can put even just four better people into the world one day it will be worth it. I want them to be able to think for themselves and carry their own weight.

Having said that, it's a wonder I have any time to spend on this site at all!