*FREE!* COUNTRY CHRISTMAS LYRICS! SUREFIRE HIT! *FREE!*

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A rope leash
Posts: 1803
Joined: Fri Jun 13, 2003 6:47 pm
Location: southern misery, USA

*FREE!* COUNTRY CHRISTMAS LYRICS! SUREFIRE HIT! *FREE!*

Postby A rope leash » Tue Dec 20, 2005 11:49 am

I don’t want to shake you up buddy but I gotta bear witness
To a half-ass Christmas
Like the kind we used to have

With a dried up tree eaten up with sparsity
With nothing underneath it but a doggie treat
And one of Aunt Ruby’s quiltin crafts
And our stockings hung up on the stove-pipe shaft
Cause we got so much more than any other has
So we gonna have a half-ass Christmas

Can you imagine our delight when my little brother Dwight
Climbed up to the attic and got the Christmas lights
He strung ‘em up here and he strung up there
And got a nice jolt when he plugged ‘em up here
But he’s alright and he’s home tonight
He ‘s havin a half-ass Christmas.

Now we been stalwart working at Wal-Mart
You can bet that we still walk a mile
But when it don’t pay it don’t matter anyway
It isn’t really worth it in the while
I’m gonna lay witness to a half-ass Christmas
And open that present with a smile


Well we had a heart attack when my ole cousin Jack
Came ridin in from OKC
With a load that was heavy in a claptrap Chevy
He brought his wife and his kids and his priest
They had a little sermon where they called us all vermin
We had to go to bed to get some peace
The good Lord knows how His birthday goes
I might as well believe in Santa, too
Well the kids all thought they’s gonna get a go-cart
The day they hoped it they will rue
I don’t wanna be crass but nog makes me sass
And we’re gonna have a half –ass Christmas

Can you see our glee when the Christmas tree
Starts to smoke and smell like creosote?
There’s nothing to fear when you have another beer
And you find that fuckin remote
I guess I could pray that Santa finds his way
To save us from this half-ass Christmas

Now the all the little peeps are all asleep
And all in the house all is night
It’s still present-free underneath the tree
And you know it really isn’t right
But there’s nothin I can do because my credit’s all screwed
I don’t want to seem listless but I gotta bear witness
I fail to see the point so I’ll smoke another joint
And try to have a half-ass Christmas.

We’re gonna have a half-ass Christmas

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A rope leash
Posts: 1803
Joined: Fri Jun 13, 2003 6:47 pm
Location: southern misery, USA

Still free!

Postby A rope leash » Thu Nov 20, 2008 11:20 am

Gee...makes me wanna get high!

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migdd
Posts: 2931
Joined: Sun Jun 22, 2003 6:16 pm
Location: Rolling in Clover, SC

Re: Still free!

Postby migdd » Thu Nov 20, 2008 8:14 pm

A rope leash wrote:Gee...makes me wanna get high!


Is there anything that doesn't make you want to get high? :wink:

User avatar
A rope leash
Posts: 1803
Joined: Fri Jun 13, 2003 6:47 pm
Location: southern misery, USA

Re: *FREE!* COUNTRY CHRISTMAS LYRICS! SUREFIRE HIT! *FREE!*

Postby A rope leash » Fri Nov 21, 2008 1:16 am

Maybe the police?

kittyaxesmall.gif
kittyaxesmall.gif (215.08 KiB) Viewed 3302 times


Anyway, thanks to the spammer guy who bumped this and then deleted himself. I forgot I was so talented.


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