". . . in a cage, on antibiotics . . ."

This is for all of your writings, songs, pictures or however else you feel like expressing yourself. Have at it!
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pip_52
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Joined: Tue Jun 03, 2003 10:45 am
Location: brooklyn

". . . in a cage, on antibiotics . . ."

Post by pip_52 »

Empty, hollow,
metallic
like a tin can
heart still pounding away
obtrusive as ever
<i>electrified</i>
all the nerves in my body
dropped down into my feet
bottomed out
the bottoms out
hijacking my awareness
any only only
and weighted down
empty, hollow,
wavering shell
solid
electric
dripping down the inside(s)
melting in a standing statue
up down back up again
silent helpless
not quite apathetic
couldnt call out if I wanted to
. . . dont want to
heart never [beating]
in my ears
in my chest
(hollow, empty)
in my feet
(electric)
nerves all a mess
scrambled in and out
<i>electrified</i>
from the inside out
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miss buenos aires
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Location: jcnj
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Post by miss buenos aires »

It's like, if a chinchilla wrote a poem. Chinchilling.
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BlueChair
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Location: Toronto, Canada
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Post by BlueChair »

Nice work, pip....
This morning you've got time for a hot, home-cooked breakfast! Delicious and piping hot in only 3 microwave minutes.
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pip_52
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Joined: Tue Jun 03, 2003 10:45 am
Location: brooklyn

Post by pip_52 »

Im not even sure I know what a chinchilla is . . . but thanks!

8)
selfmademug

Post by selfmademug »

Wow. Sad and anxious. Horrible combination that I know well. Some beautiful writing, Pip.
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bambooneedle
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Joined: Tue Jun 03, 2003 4:02 pm
Location: a few thousand miles south east of Zanzibar

Post by bambooneedle »

Good one, Pip. It reminds me a bit of some Suzanne Vega.

For example:

Birth-day (Love Made Real) (music & lyrics by Suzanne Vega) -- a song about the experience giving birth, set to a driving anxious beat.

one thing I know
this pain will go

step through all that's left to feel
I wait to meet my love made real

don't move don't touch
don't talk so much

strip and find the place to kneel
I wait to meet my love made real

one thing I know
this day will go

don't touch don't talk crawl the wall
she's the ticket to the future don't listen down the hall
you can say your prayer to the head of this bed
when it begins at your knees and goes right to your head

birth-day

strap me down from wrist to heel
I wait to meet my love made real

one thing I know
this day will go

shake all over like an old sick dog
there's a needle here needle there tremble in the fog
it's a tight squeeze vice grip ice and fire
she's a hot little treasure and the wave goes higher

birth-day
birth-day


Copyright 1996 WB Music Corp.(ASCAP)/Waifersongs, Ltd. (ASCAP)
All Rights Reserved/Used By Permission

Suzanne Vega - vocals, riff guitar
Bruce Thomas - bass
Jerry Marotta, Pete Thomas - drums, percussion
Steve Donnelly - electric guitars
Mitchell Froom - keyboards
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