Sun-de-ja-vu

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A rope leash
Posts: 1835
Joined: Fri Jun 13, 2003 6:47 pm
Location: southern misery, USA

Sun-de-ja-vu

Post by A rope leash »

Here he comes again
in that crazy-dream guise
intangible as ever

what a guy

a messenger from the Sun, no less

but do I care, and
can I care?
in my dozy lassitude
do I care?

Hell no…

he’s Apollo or Helios
or some winged Merc
or a hot little demon
satanic
mantic
jerk

a burning little imp
with a vatic
antic
quirk

and do I care? Or
can I care?
in my slumbering magnitude
do I care?

Hell no

but does that stop him?
does that keep him
from presenting his blasted show?

Hell no…

he is the one
who is in control

so what is this?
as if I know, or
yes, I know…
just another
phantasm show

and I’ve been here
I know
I’ve been here before but no
I’ve seen this place, but no

just another dream
but no…

can’t fool me now
I know
I’ve seen it all before but no

I’m in on it now
it’s just a tease
just another
seer’s breeze

leave me now
go away please

away with your tantalizing tidbits
that turn parcels of my time
to wandering misfits

spare me your direct hits

spare me
your apocalyptic tricks
that show nothing
revealing everything

what Hell you bring

spare me
the song you sing
it’s sibylline slate
that betrays me
betrays my fate

revealing nothing great
but time’s fixed state

spare me
the unwelcome weight
of your prophetic vice
the knowledge of a future
devoid of spice

go away now
with your fatidic ice
that’s meant to entice

but chills me only

go away
spare me
the heretofore life
that lacks the dice

spare me the shock when time strikes twice…
User avatar
A rope leash
Posts: 1835
Joined: Fri Jun 13, 2003 6:47 pm
Location: southern misery, USA

The nature of time

Post by A rope leash »

I wrote this poem more than twenty years ago.

Well, it happened again. Josie said something about some KMart gift cards, and I know I heard her say the exact same thing before, but how could that be?

Well, I dreamed this little bit of my life maybe about three years ago. It happens a lot, really, and I don't much like it but I have to admit that it's really way past time to confront it.

My grandma was the same way. The deja-vu dream usually takes months to pan out in real life, but on occasion the real life segment comes within a few days of the dream. There is another kind of trick that I call
the "symbolic" prophecy, which for the most part is simply a crazy dream that somehow has pertenance in the events of the coming day, (like say I dream that my car is upside down, and the next day, sure enough,
my car is having problems). Many of these dreams are quite dramatic, like when my dad died. Let's just say I wasn't as surprised as everyone else. Something tipped me off.

And it's frustrating. I know that lifelines are fixed, or at least mine is, but I don't know to what extent. Perhaps there are many possible futures, all contingent on the now. Incredible as it may seem, I have personal evidence of time's design as it applies to the life of a human. The possibilties are staggering, as well as the implications.

One of those scenarios involves the existence of a god, and if I also admit that many of the more resounding dreams contain imagery of a religious nature, then I must assume that whatever it is that is giving me the insight also has a good understanding of what imagery will really get my attention. It very true of many of my dreams, even the normal-crazy non-prophetic ones, that the subject and presentation are set up to push as many of my "touchy" buttons as possible. Why would I dream that my first wife is in danger and needs my help? I never think about her in the day. She's perfectly fine, I'm sure. I've just got this built-in sabotage, and I swear it's like someone fucking with my head, and of course it must be, even if it's only me.

While I could go along with the god scenario, it's tough to give up free will. Maybe many of the dreams I've had were futures that did not come true. It could be a part of the human machinery, or software, that we dream first and then construct our lives from the now into a future of limited options based on circumstances, actions, and decisions occurring during successive nows. In short, our individual futures are based largely on where we have placed ourselves, and our fates are dependent on everyday decisions large and small.

While it matters little to me that anyone believes or understands what I am saying, I feel the need to speak about it on occaision. I know for an undemonstrable fact that the future can be seen ahead of time, and perhaps even predicted. That's an incredible bit of information, and I threaten my own reputation by standing by it, but since I often dream things that literally come true, then I must admit that time is fixed in some way. The scale of the fix could be enormous, even divine, or random and natural, and explainable without the introduction of a scenario involving intelligent design. The main inference that should be derived from such information is that we either have a say in what happens to ourselves or we don't.

In everyday life, we make choices that influence our circumstances. That's why I choose to believe that fate is somewhat malleable, that what happens to us starts first with our circumstances, and our futures change based on what we do. What can happen is limited, thus the ability of some folks like me and grandma to get an occasional glimpse into the forelife. Potential events are possiblities for quite some time, until such time as the now presses it, and the event becomes inevitable. That's when you get the "night before" dream.

How it happens, I can't explain. I just know it does.
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